


We Haven't Spoke Since You Went Away

by carmelfringe



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Best Friends, Famous Harry, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Non-Famous Louis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-07-06
Packaged: 2018-11-28 17:52:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11423091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carmelfringe/pseuds/carmelfringe
Summary: “You still love him.”“I don’t. I just miss him, is all.”“You can lie to me, I don’t mind that. But don’t lie to yourself, you may get lost in it, darling.”or:  Louis and Harry were best friends with mutual crushes on each other. Miscommunication happened, they didn’t stay in touch and now, three years later, Louis somehow found himself being the med assistance on Harry’s concert.





	We Haven't Spoke Since You Went Away

**Author's Note:**

> Hello lovely people!  
> It took me a lot of time to write this because I was too lazy to finish it hahah. But now I have some free time :) Also, I mention it in every one of my works: English is not my mother tongue so if there are any mistakes-sorry!

Love. Love is a strange thing that sometimes makes you do crazy things that have never crossed your mind. It happens unexpectedly. You fall for a person and all of a sudden they're all you see. It can be anyone. A boy who sits by the window in your geography classes, a girl whose locker is next to yours. You may fall for a person you barely know or for someone you know better than anyone. Your best friend. And this is precisely what happened in the case of Louis Tomlinson. 

It was unexpected. He vaguely remembers what exactly made him fall for Harry. Was it his charm? His love for everyone? The way he talked, smooth and slow? Or maybe this crater-like dimple that popped every time he smiled? Louis honestly had no idea, maybe it was all these things combined. But did he ever tell Harry? No. Does he, after they drifted apart, still have feelings for him? Yeah, it’s possible though he’d never admit to it. 

But let’s not dwell on that right now. 

Tired from uni, Louis made himself some herbal tea to calm his nerves. Two major tests all in one day were a bit too much and he needed some well deserved time for himself. This is why he sat comfortably under a fluffy blanket he got for his birthday from his mum, grabbed the remote and turned the tv on.

“Good evening, London! How are we on this beautiful autumn evening?” A woman with a too-wide-to-look-real smile said to the camera. 

_Great. Late night celebrity gossip show was on, something which didn’t require a lot of brains. Exactly what Louis needed._

“I hope you’re doing well and if not,”—the woman continued— “then you’ll probably feel a lot better once I’ve introduced you to tonight’s guest!” Her cheerful sentence was followed by loud screams from the audience which, from what Louis could observe, consisted mostly of teenage girls. 

“Yes, Bethany, show me some more Vine stars. Can’t wait to see which one dabbed the best this week.” Louis muttered while grabbing Chinese-takeaway leftovers from yesterday and shoving them oh-so-gracefully into his mouth. 

“Everybody, please give a warm welcome to Harry Styles!” 

_Well, that for sure isn’t a Vine star._

Louis turned the volume up and got closer to the tv. 

“Hello, Harry. How are you feeling? Excited for your new single? Because I sure am, as well as your fans. Right, guys?” Bethany sat herself on a couch opposite Harry and the audience screamed so loud Louis thought he’d be deaf in a minute.

“Of course I am. I’ve worked really hard on it and I think the fans will appreciate it. I poured my soul into this song, as cliché as it sounds. But yeah, I really like it,” he said with a small smile, sounding almost…bashful? 

“Can you tell us something more about the song? Everything we know so far is only the title. We need more, Harry. Come on. I’ll take anything.”

“Uh… I don’t wanna ruin the surprise but I can tell you something about it. _From the Dining Table_ is a ballad. Sorry for everyone who wanted something catchy! Also, not to be self-obsessed or anything, but in my opinion this is the best song I’ve ever written. I just love it. I hope you guys will, too.”

“A ballad, huh? What a pleasant surprise! Since you love the lyrics so much, what inspired you to write this song? I’m curious.”

“It’s kinda private…” Harry said a bit hesitantly.

“That’s why I’m asking!” Bethany laughed loudly and Harry cracked a forced smile.

_This blonde bitch is gonna be the next Perez Hilton I swear to God._

“But in all seriousness, no pressure. Some things must be kept private I guess.”

“I can tell you _something_ but not the whole story, obviously.” Harry cheekily smiled and winked at the camera. “Well, it’s a song about someone who’s been in my heart for years even though I haven’t been in theirs.”

 _He’s still just as sappy as he was three years ago_ \- Louis thought, _-if not more. Honestly, nothing’s changed apart from the fact that his left ear is pierced and he has a whole lot of hot tattoos. Fuck, did I say “hot”?_

“That sounds beautiful, Harry. I’m absolutely thrilled at what you have in store for us." Bethany smiled and with that, the show was over. 

And if Louis wondered for the rest of the evening about whom _From the Dining Table_ is, then that’s nobody’s business but his own. And if a small spark of hope _hey, it might be about me_ ignited in his heart, he doomed it until he was hundred percent sure it died. 

***

 

It was his tenth shot that made him stand on a table and perform a rather dramatic act of singing Taylor Swift at the top of his lungs. Blame his light head for the fact that he can’t handle alcohol. 

Stumbling a little while trying his best to dodge all the glasses on the table (and failing miserably), he screamed “THE MORE I THINK ABOUT IT NOW, THE LESS I KNO-O-OW, ALL I KNOW IS THAT YOU DROVE US OFF THE ROAD!”

Suddenly, a small hand tapped his ankle making him almost lose his balance.

“Easy there, Taylor Swift. Maybe it’s time for a small break, yeah?” said a blonde girl, smiling slightly at her drunk best friend. He just looked _so funny._

“Shush, Eve. Can’t you see I’m currently busy?” 

“Yeah yeah, okay. Off the table.”

“Geez, calm down will you?”

“Trust me, I’m doing you a huge favour. You’ll thank me tomorrow.”

With that, she grabbed his hand and lead him to a more secluded part of the bar to join their friends at a small booth. Louis sat next to Eve and leaned his head on her shoulder, being tired after his “performance”. This was going to be a long night. 

 

***

Harry Styles believes in fate. Meeting your soulmate in a grocery shop, bumping into them at a carnival or sitting next to them on the bus — these are not just happy coincidences. There must be some special force that makes soulmates meet. Something that makes person A and B end up being in the same place at the same time. He likes to think that when something is destined to happen, it will. This is why he still has hope he and Louis Tomlinson will reunite someday in the future. Because they are soulmates. He knows they fell out of touch, he knows they’re not friends anymore,  he knows that even after endless efforts to reach him he still can’t, that the possibility of randomly bumping into Louis on the streets is highly unlikely. Even now, though, he still hopes his fate will help.  

It was a Friday evening and Harry just got home after being in the studio for 5 hours and recording his new album. Some Fridays he spent partying, other Fridays he just chilled at home with friends. That night it was the latter. He was sitting on his expensive leather couch and sipping beer while pouring his heart out to Niall, his manager.

“Harry, mate, you know I love you to bits but you really need to get over the fact that there is no Louis Tomlinson in your life anymore. I know you two were really close but come on, you need to move on.”

Harry didn’t respond for a while. He just stared at the empty beer bottle on the table. Suddenly, his eyes lit up. 

“Have you tried contacting Stan? You know, the guy who used to live in his neighbourhood.”

Niall groaned and threw his head back. Honestly, Harry was _unbelievable._

“The key words are _used to_. Besides, how will we be able to track him down? We’re no FBI. Just like your life had changed, everyone else’s lives had, too.”

“It’s just…It’s hard to let go of something that was so precious to you. My friendship with Louis was one of a kind. I really miss him. I know it’s been a while. A long while I must say. But after I registered I lost him I also somehow realised that to me it was never only friendship. I always wanted more. I’m not sure if he wanted the same, though. But it doesn’t matter. What matters is that we were close for 5 years. Five fucking years, Niall! How is it possible that one day he was a part of my life and then the next day he was gone just like that?!”

It was the sadness in Harry’s tone that made Niall look at him with sympathy. He didn’t know that. He simply thought that Louis was someone Harry was once friends with and there was something in Louis that made him special. So special he was still in Harry’s heart even after they drifted apart three years ago. 

 

***

It was nearing 7:30 pm and Louis was almost asleep when he heard some shuffling. He lifted his head up from the table and noticed that everyone from his class was slowly raising up from their seats.

Then, the professor spoke up. 

“Okay class, I know the lecture’s come to an end but I wanna make a short announcement nevertheless.” 

A few groans were heard.

“Oh, stop groaning. This announcement isn't bad at all. Actually, it is very kind of me to do this for you. I know this year is stressful for all of you with exams every week and lectures till late night hours. So I made a deal with _somebody_ and I think you might like it. Namely, I will choose three best students and ask for their help with something special.” — he opened his small notebook — “Attwood, Cooper and Tomlinson. Congratulations, wait five more minutes please. As for the rest of you, don’t worry, there will be plenty more of these special occasions. Class dismissed, goodnight.”

Louis sobered up and blinked in confusion. He knew he wasn’t a bad student but this was quite unexpected.

_What is this about?_

Again, a voice cut through his thoughts and brought him back to the reality. 

“You’re probably wondering what I meant by _something special_ , right? Well, let me shortly explain. Every now and then there’s this big event where medical assistance is needed and we send three of our best, most promising students. It’s a great learning experience for them as well as a test to check their abilities because, as you know, if something happens you need to react instantly. This is why I chose the three of you.”

“We’re all flattered, professor. But what exactly is this event?”Alice Attwood asked before Louis had a chance to do it. 

“You know the teenage heartthrob Harry Styles? He has a concert at the O2 arena and medical assistance is much needed. Twenty-four thousand people will be there, the show’s completely sold out. At least that’s what the head of O2 told me.”

_Sold out within a minute, to be precise. You’re not fast enough, you don’t get your ticket. This is why I lost a chance to see my ex-best friend doing what he loves the most. Until Heavens saw my suffering and decided to have mercy on me, I guess._

Louis pinched himself in the elbow to see if this was a dream. But the squeals coming from the girls next to him were a solid proof that this was, in fact, reality. While the chances of Harry noticing him in the crowd of twenty-four thousand people were highly unlikely, he was still the happiest person on earth because he’ll get to see him in person after three years. And this was more than he could ask for.

 

***

When anything happens, Louis calls Lottie. This was no exception. 

“Lottie guess what.”

“What?”

“No, you have to guess.”

“Louis, please just tell me straight away” she sighed. 

“Okay, I’ll tell you if you insist. You know who’s performing on the O2 next Saturday?”

“The love of your life Harry Styles? Yes, I know. Casey and Melissa managed to buy the tickets and this concert is all they’ve been talking about the past month.”

“You know who else is seeing Harry on Saturday?” The excitement in his voice was a dead giveaway. 

“No way…”

“Yes way!”

“How?!”

“I have my tricks, honey.”

Even though she couldn't see him, Lottie was sure there was a stupid smirk smeared across her brother’s face. 

He told her the whole story and then the conversation somehow took an unexpected turn when she said something that caught Louis off guard. 

“You still love him.”

_No, Lottie. I’m pretty sure we’ve already sorted it out._

“I don’t. I just miss him, is all.”

“You can lie to me, I don’t mind that. But don’t lie to yourself, you may get lost in it, darling.”

 

It was a Thursday morning and Louis was oddly energetic, which caused his friend Eve to give him a questioning look. She knew something was up. He was never lively at this time of the day, she usually had to force him to leave his bed and go to the morning lecture. 

“Okay, I’m done pretending like I’m not curious. What is up with you today? And don’t tell me nothing cause we both know that’s not true. Did you meet someone?”

“I wish, Eve, I wish!”

“Right, I forgot you’re still not over your friend Harry.”

“Ex-fucking-cuse me?! I am!” He shrieked in a defensive tone, almost as if he got caught while doing something illegal. 

“If you’re over him then why are you constantly mentioning him? Ha, gotcha! But seriously, Lou. I have no idea who the guy is but I can see that he meant for you a lot more than what you let yourself think. Just please, don’t let him overcome your senses and try to be open to new people. Who knows, maybe you’ll find someone great.” she said with a warm smile and patted his back.

“Okay. I’ll try, I promise.”

“So… We got a little off topic here, my dear friend. You still haven’t told me the reason you’re acting so not-you.”

Louis smiled, which caused Eve to questioningly raise her eyebrows. 

“Okay. So I miiiight be coming to a Harry Styles gig this Saturday.” He said and casted a glance at his best friend whose pupils were wider than saucers. 

“WHAT?! How? I thought you didn’t manage to get the tickets on time though?”

“That’s true. But apparently life doesn't hate me this much and I ended up being the medical assistance on Harry’s concert. If anything happens, I’ll be there to help. It’s a win-win situation because it’ll give me bonus points on my course at uni and I’ll get to see Harry perform.” Louis winked at the girl and wrote something in his notebook to make it look like as if he was paying attention in class and not talking since the beginning of the lesson.

“You’re very lucky, I hope you know that. I’m so happy for you, mate! Please take loads of photos and videos and better catch the closest to the stage seats.”

“I’ll try my best, honey.”

 

***

He frowned and threw yet another shirt on the bed, murmuring under his breath "this looks stupid on me". Then, after approximately 15 seconds he thought: _It’s not like he’ll see me among thousands of people but I still gotta look neat. Maybe I’ll bump into someone nice and my non-existent love life will rise from the ashes._

He put on jeans along with a black tank top _to show off my tattoos_ , grabbed an ID card with _Louis Tomlinson, medical assistance_ written on it, hung it on a lanyard around his neck and with that, left the apartment. 

 

“Amber, I might actually go into a cardiac arrest!” was one of the many crazy things he’d heard since arriving at the arena and getting assigned to a certain part of it. This part being, floor on the right side of the stage. Pretty nice view, he must say. 

_Dear God, I hope this girl won’t actually do that._

Suddenly, the lights went off and a big countdown could be seen on the screen onstage. 

Everyone screamed, Louis included. He felt the hype and realised he was less than 30 seconds away from seeing the boy who, after three long years of lost contact and not speaking to each other, was still somehow dear to his heart. 

Three.

Two. 

One.

Everything was pitch black when the beginning of Harry’s song _Only Angel_ played. Then, the stage was abruptly lit up and there he was. 

If you confronted Louis about it, he would never admit that his breath got caught in his throat. But it is precisely what happened. Of course, he’d seen Harry during the past three years, there was absolutely no way he could avoid it. His dimpled face was literally everywhere — starting from magazines, billboards and interviews, ending on pillowcases in Tesco. Given that, seeing him in person shouldn’t have been this surprising. But boy, it was. Especially that Louis could see him quite clearly. And after an hour he got reminded what exactly made him fall for Harry. The boy joked and spoke to the audience as if these twenty-four thousand people were his friends and he was telling various stories from his life along with some life advises. He was charismatic, funny and just charming in general. Louis couldn’t stop smiling. It was a little bittersweet. He knew Harry couldn’t see him. He knew he wouldn't get to talk to him ever again in his life. But nevertheless, he was happy with what he got. Seeing his ex-best friend and biggest love live his dream life and do what he loves the most was more than satisfying. 

He was abruptly pulled from his thoughts when he heard someone on his right scream “Help!”. The boy quickly turned and saw a crowd of people surrounding a girl who was lying on the floor motionless. In a matter of seconds he was kneeling by her and put his fingers on her neck to check her pulse. 

“She told me she was feeling dizzy, was sweating badly and speaking kid of slurry right before she fainted. I don’t know what to do, please, please help me” said a girl who was also kneeling next to the victim, probably the one who called for help. 

“Is she a diabetic?” he asked.

“Yes. It’s bad, isn't it?” She was worried, her voice was wavering. She rummaged through her friend’s purse and pulled out her health card. 

“Please don’t panic, I’ll try my best to help your friend.” Louis said while quickly reading through the girl’s health card to check her weight, age and allergies and search what treatment methods could be applied. Then, he opened the first-aid kit he had in his bag during the whole show. Louis found what he was looking for in a few seconds. 

“Now, I’m going to give your friend a glucagon injection as she appears to be in severe hypoglycaemia.” 

After he was done and a short period of time passed, the girl’s eyes opened. He helped her sit up and just as he did that, he heard:

“Hold on guys. Wait, wait, wait. Is everything okay on the right?”

The arena was silent. Well, not a hundred percent silent, but Harry’s words could be clearly heard. 

“Can someone please direct the light at what’s happening? I think it’d be a little easier for the medics to find the person that way.”

“She has already received help and is okay!” shouted someone to Harry. But not before the light shone on Louis and the girl. He was examining her while holding a soda can to her mouth. 

“Drink up, drink up. You need carbohydrates, my lady. Did you take insulin and forget to eat today?”

“Exactly that. I should’ve known better but today I was a mess. Was too excited about the concert, I guess.”

“We all were, I can assure you that. Now, relax and drink some more.”

It was only then that Louis noticed he was literally in the spotlight. He lifted his head and then the unexpected happened. 

The microphone picked up on Harry whispering to himself  “Can’t believe it’s really you.”

_He’s looking right at me._

 

***

Louis was stunned. There he was, kneeling on the floor, light nearly blinding him and Harry Styles looking at him with an unreadable expression on his face. He saw him whispering something to a security guard standing near the stage.

“Okay, all is good now. On to the last song, guys.”

He went to the centre of the stage and played a few chords on his guitar. The whole arena went silent as he sung.

 

_Woke up alone in this hotel room_

_Played with myself, where were you?_

_Fell back to sleep, I got drunk by noon_

_I've never felt less cool_

 

Louis just stood there mesmerised. His head couldn’t wrap around the thought that Harry knew he was there, he saw him. And goddammit, he looked as perfect as he did at the time when they were friends. Harry always resembled a statue carefully crafted by Michelangelo himself or one of Rafael Santi’s paintings. Louis remembered this cliché saying he once heard: Some people are artists. Some, themselves, are art. And Harry somehow managed to be both. 

 

_We haven't spoke since you went away_

_Comfortable silence is so overrated_

_Why won't you ever be the first one to break?_

_Even the phone misses your call, by the way_

The concert came to an end and Louis had to wait extra long to leave the arena as there was a large crowd heading towards the exit. However, when he was just about to leave, he felt a hand gently pull at his shoulder. The boy turned around and came face to face with a tall man who was wearing a black shirt with _security_ written across on it. 

“Are you Louis?” he asked while looking closely at the boy. 

“Yes, I am.” he answered a bit cautiously.  “Are there any problems? Is medical assistance needed? I’m done with my duty but I don’t mind staying a little longer.”

“No, no, there aren't any issues. I was just asked to make sure you don’t leave the arena in the next twenty minutes.”

“Why?”

But before the guard had a chance to answer, Louis heard an all too familiar voice scream:

“LOUIS! WAIT!”

 

So he waited. 

 

Harry approached him in the matter of seconds. He was breathing heavily and leaning on the wall for support. 

“You skip the gym twice and that’s what you get for it.”

Louis smiled and raised his eyebrows. 

“Happy to see you, Harry. Can’t ask you what you’ve been up to considering I already know the answer to that. But I can’t help but wonder why you’d told your guard to stop me from leaving the arena.” He tried to mask his excitement and curiosity with a smirk and a playful façade. 

“Oh. Yeah, that.” Wait a minute, was Harry _blushing?_ “I…um… wanted to thank you for what you did during my concert. How you managed to keep your cool and helped the girl. I really admire that.” His eyes were earnest and his lips formed a soft smile. 

“It’s no big deal. That’s what I was here for.”

“Right.”

“Not that I wasn’t here to watch your show! Shit, this came out wrong, didn’t it? It’s just… This job literally fell from heaven because it was the only way to see you perform as I couldn’t manage to get your damn tickets.”

“You wanted to get my tickets?”

Harry couldn't believe it. Louis wanted to go to his concert. Not as medical assistance but because he simply wanted to. Even after years of not talking he still was interested in what he was doing and wanted to see him. 

“Of course I did. I really wanted to see you living your dream and entertaining thousands of people with your presence, Harry.”

Harry replied after a few seconds. 

“I’m kinda surprised, to be completely honest. Because, you know-”

“We haven’t spoken for God knows how long?” Louis finished for him.

“Yeah, exactly.”

 

For a moment neither of them spoke, then Louis broke the silence.

“You know… despite the fact that I wasn’t your friend anymore, I was still curious as to what you were up to. I watched some of your interviews, bought your albums and magazines with you on the cover.” He admitted shyly but looked Harry straight in the eye.

“Why?” The curly haired boy was genuinely curious. 

“Because I was proud of you. I _am_ proud of you. You’ve achieved so much. You chased your dreams and had the courage to do so. Not many of us would be able to do what you did. And also…” he paused for a second, diverted his eyes from Harry’s and added quietly “…because I missed you.”

“You know who gave me this courage? You. And I didn’t even get the chance to thank you for that before you were out of my life. What happened between us? Do you know how much I’ve missed you, Lou?” 

Harry’s tone was desperate and he sounded hundred percent honest.  Because he really did miss Louis. They were so close for five years and then, all of a sudden, everything stopped. No more late night talks, no more sleepovers, no more spending time together. Harry knew things would change once he got famous after The X Factor but he never would’ve expected them to break apart. 

“I don't know what happened, Harry. Maybe you were too busy, maybe I didn't wanna be a burden in your career, maybe I was the busy one. But I regret this. So fucking much.”

“You wouldn't have been a burden. Everything was easier with you by my side.”

“Harry… I kept it to myself for as long as I can remember but now that you’re here and I have zero fucks left to give I might as well tell you now. Did you know back then that my feelings for you were never only friendly? That I wanted us to be something more than just best friends?”

To say Harry was surprised would be a huge understatement. He was shocked. Louis liked him in _that way_? Had he known earlier…

“No way… No way! Fuck, why didn’t you tell me?!”

“Maybe because I was afraid to destroy our friendship and make things awkward between us? Kinda ironic because our friendship ended anyway. But still…I was scared.”

“So that’s why we fell out of touch?” Harry’s tone was a bit sorrowful, like he was angry with himself.

“Well I didn't wanna be a bother in your career. Be this sappy, miserable best friend who’d just tag along. I knew that I wouldn’t get over you and eventually you’d notice.” Louis simply shrugged. 

“I’m so mad.”

“Why?”

“Because if I had known, I would’ve done something about it.”

“Like what? There wasn’t much you could have done, Harry.”

“Like tell you that this feeling was mutual. Shame we didn’t get to discuss it.”

And it was the first time that Louis Tomlinson was left speechless. He always knew what to say, had his way with words. But at that moment, when he opened his mouth, no words came out. What was he even supposed to say? Fortunately, this time it was Harry who broke the silence.

“So… what do we do? I don’t wanna lose you again, Lou.”

_Oh how I’ve missed hearing him call me that._

“Give me your number. Text me, call me, anytime you want. Even my phone misses your call, by the way.”

“I hope you figured out this song is about you.” Harry smiled and Louis’ heart clenched because _God I yearned for this smile so much._

“I was counting on it.”

 

 

 

_Maybe one day you'll call me and tell me that you're sorry too_

 

And maybe he did.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! If you feel like chatting, come find me on twitter: @swiftIouie. :) Feedback is much appreciated!


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